Friday, December 29, 2006

Christmas 2006

Well, all, Christmas went off without a hitch. Wade was able to take massive amounts of time off the few days before Christmas which was such an immense help. I was able to wrap gifts, cook and get several much needed breaks throughout the days. Ahhh, it was nice. Christmas was hard, but not as hard as I thought it would be. The day was rather long especially since Sydney likes to take only about an hour nap, BOO!!!!!!!!! She's at that age where she wants EVERYTHING especially if Grace is holding it and then proceeds to throw a fit if she doesn't get right that very second. It gets a bit tedious...

The gifts were flowing at our house as usual. Santa decided that Grace had been a very good girl this year and proceeded to makeover the backhouse into her very own playroom (thanks, Brian!). This pic really doesn't do it justice, but it looks so darling. There is a blackboard wall, table and chairs, easel, and tons of art supplies. Anyway, Grace was stunned and thrilled. It was fun.

She also got roller skates and a new robe (just like Mama's!).

Even Sydney got into the holiday spirit and opened a couple presents. Whenever she saw the gift, she would get really excited and say, "AHHHHHH". It was highly entertaining.

This last picture I just had to put up here because it was the first time she ever wore a skirt. It looks slightly awkward because she so boyish in her appearance.
Hey, we don't call her crusher for nothing.

Saturday, December 23, 2006

random pics

Not a lot going on over here minus our small bout with the stomach virus...just found some cute pics and wanted to share.
The first pic is an obvious one and Sydney's first time on Santa's lap (she was asleep in her stroller last year). Excited aren't they?

the next pic is the little chubby ball in the bathtub


Grace was one of five little ducks during her kindergarten play...doesn't she look soooo cute (and young!)

trimming the tree with the girlies! In reality the tree had been decorated for weeks but don't they look cute!
MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Saturday, December 16, 2006

What amazing ladies!

Remember this post. Well, Camille and Ashli took it upon themselves to make me pot roast and dessert. I was so pleasantly surprised to come home after a hairy basketball practice and find a crock pot of delectable pot roast simmering in my kitchen. I'll tell you what it was dellllicious! And so thoughtful! Thank you ladies. Everybody lapped up the food and ate the pudding/chocolate/graham cracker dessert straight from the fridge...mmmmmm, goodness. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

(...I was just fondly remembering my mother's homemade monkey bread...just kidding, Camille!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

Love you guys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

woe is me...

So, lately I have had the pleasure of assisting in the representation of juveniles that have the shittiest parents on earth. I simply do not understand the reasoning behind bringing into the world a child or children and deciding to do everything in your power to make sure that have no chance in hell of growing up to be a decent person. Wow. Now that was a run on sentence. There are two twin boys in particular that I have developed a bond with. They are locked up for an assault and battery(unrelated to said shitty dad) and I firmly believe that their actions were the result of self-defense. Oh I know all you naysayers out there (cough,bubby, cough, Wade, cough) think I am a naive bleeding heart that would believe anything told to me. Not true I say. I did my homework. I read the police reports, spoke with the kids, spoke with the dad! etc etc. Now I am not going to get into particulars here for various reasons but while speaking with the kids (age 14) they discussed with me the fact that there dad is a raging alcoholic (he really doesn't drink that much just EVERY DAY ALL DAY) and that yea, he used to beat them to a bloody pulp around the age of 5 on (no but really he loves us and is SUCH a good dad). This is the kind of deluded thinking I am dealing with here. After I lifted my chin off of the table I attempted to discuss ways in which they could begin to turn there life around. Mind you I do believe this can happen but I can't help but worry (and worry I will!) that these darling boys are eternally screwed. This is there only role model. Mom relinquished parental rights at their very unimportant age of 3 because she was/is addicted to meth (but it's just a "small drug problem"). I want to cry, I want to open my home and wallet to help. I know I cannot and will not do this but REALLY is anyone surprised that these boys have selected this path of self-destruction and poor choices.

So fast forward to this afternoon in the car with Grace. She was asking me if I ever dream about her and I replied, "Oh yes all the time." She says, "well what do I do in your dream" to which I reply, "Oh, your a good girl..." She says, "wouldn't that be funny if in your dream I was being a bad girl," and I say, "well, if you were being a bad girl I guess I would have to spank your bottom in my dream," to which she throws her head back and laughs uncontrollably for a good 2 minutes, "you are the funniest mom in the whole world!" Funny because this child has never been spanked in her entire life for anything. For me, spanking simply takes care of the parents immediate anger and I don't see how the child can learn the consequence from the mistake, instead, I believe, they then fear the spank and lose sight of the original or subsequent problem. Make sense? Anywho, this is not a debate or discussion about spanking, it is about an important and heartbreaking fact that these boys would never, will never, find what my darling daughter thought was so funny about that dream.


Tuesday, December 12, 2006

sad, sad, loathing, loathing

Once again I am apologizing for the tardiness of my newest post. Okay, the title isn't allll true. We're pretty crazy in the Starr family. Wade is working an ungodly amount this month and I feel so sorry for him because he comes home and literally lays on the couch without uttering a word. I think his mouth hurts from talking so damn much and his legs hurt from running around that damn gigantic restaurant. Anyway. The holiday season is shaping up as expected with me continuing to run across things that my mom gave me last Christmas and me seeing things that she would have loved. Arggggg, it sucks. I found several pictures of myself with Sydney when she was about 3 months old that my mom had taken. I can remember exactly what we were doing. I was laying on her bed laughing while she took some darling shots of us. I look at myself in those pictures and I can't help but think I look so different. I hadn't yet been subjected to the fact that I would never see her again or hear her voice or eat her pot roast. It's just a really strange feeling that's hard to describe.

I have hesitated to write about this, but those of you who know me well already know this and that is the fact that my dad has a girlfriend. It's just soooo strange. Part of me thinks it helps him get through this time but another part of me thinks he is a selfish asshole that can't even give my mom the decency of one year to wait to fill up his social calendar with another hussy women. And the last part is definitely true. He goes out with her in some capacity every night. I simply cannot wrap my brain around this. And, yes, I know, men can't do anything without a woman taking care of him, or so everyone has told me. I find it absolutely asinine that we women can excuse and justify men's behavior on a daily basis. Blah! Anywho...all I really care about is not hearing anything about wedding bells, I think that would kill me. Dead. Dunzo. Gone. My brother assures me that this will not happen so I guess I'll hold him to that! If he's wrong he can help Wade lift my lifeless body from the couch...

Monday, December 04, 2006

There's no I in Team

Grace had her first basketball game on Saturday after 2 practices about 2 weeks ago. Oh yea, we were in for a comedy of errors! In kindergarten basketball they don't have to dribble just take turns "guarding" and "shooting". Unfortunately, she didn't make a goal, but boy did she certainly act in typical Grace fashion. This first two pictures are of her "guarding". Notice how she's really into the game at this point. Atta girl!

The next picture you can tell she's getting a little more aggressive, actually lunging for the ball. If you notice, none of the other kids are even moving a body part, but, hell who cares! she got the ball! WooHoo!

And typically, here is what Sydney did during the big game:

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm , two fisted, no less!

Friday, December 01, 2006

Things I hate about snow

Let me start off by saying that I am really not that negative (I'm sure the hubby would disagree) but there are certain things that just piss me off during this kind of weather.
1.) No school. Ok, this is a no brainer here. Our kids get serious cabin fever and if you have a 5 year old like mine (which no one does) this gives her unlimited time for "let's pretend" type games. I absolutely loathe these kind of games. Here is an example of this type of fun.
"Mom, I'm gonna be this really pretty barbie and you can be the really ugly one."
"Grace! She's not really ugly (as far as I know they haven't made the pig-face looking barbie yet)."
"OK! let's pretend that your barbie won't clean her room and the daddy gets really mad at her and she gets in a lot of trouble and then my barbie cleans her room spic-and-span (actual words here) and the daddy lets her have ice cream."
So, you see where this is going, my barbie is the stupid, shitty one and hers is the angel. Weird, I know. No, but really, private schools should NEVER be closed in my opinion. We pay enough GD money to make our own informed decision as to when it is safe to drive our adorable tots (2 freaking blocks) to school. You're not comfortable driving, good, you choose not to send your kids. Period.
2.) The fucking weathermen. Ok, seriously, do we have to watch the same shit over and over and over and over and NOT broadcast the Today Show. Really. We know. It's cold, it's icy and no one should drive. And just in case we don't get it, the wonderful ticker on the top telling us that EVERYLIVINGTHINGINTHESTATEOFOKLAHOMAISCLOSED!!!!!!!! No shit. It's the first storm of the season, everything is closed at least one day.
3.) Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Here's to cabin fever, people!

Saturday, November 25, 2006

I'm Baaaaackkkkk!

Sorry people!! We have been without a computer for over a week now and finally bought a new laptop! It's been killing me! I haven't looked at a computer in over a week and now that I have access to one I'm too overwhelmed to check all the blogs!!

Anyway, Las Vegas was fabu! I swear Wade had to drag me out of there kicking and screaming on Sunday. My personal heaven is Vegas. I love the whole vibe of that city, not to mention the food and gambling, my 2 favorite past times. wow, simply spectacular fun.

Wade always has his eyes out for me for movie stars anywhere we go and, sure enough, as I was playing some cards I hear Wade yelling at me from another table, "Ginny, there's your guys." I look up thinking, HUH?? and sure enough there was Carlos and Mike from desperate housewives. Exciting, no?

I have so much going on at work, but I'll save that for another post. I'll just leave you with a couple pics from the trip.! Missed y'all!!

Here is Wade's best friend from Altus, Jeremy, who was recently dumped by his wife of 6 years. ouch.

And here we are at MIX at Mandalay Bay. Probably the coolest looking restaurant/bar I've personally ever witnessed. Aren't we precious?!? Yea, you know I'm showing a little cleavage in Vegas...

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Happy Birthday to me!

I am really not one to get all into the birthday cheer, but thanks to my 5 year old (and my 36 year old) there's no getting around it. Grace reminded me at least 6 days prior to the big day that "3 more days..." etc. All that to say, my darling hubby has far exceeded expectations again. We've got the big trip to Vegas this weekend (sooooooo excited I can barely stand it!!!!!!!!!!) but also an ungodly amount of gifts. He thrives on this and now he's got the little one in on it too. I can already see that he is making Grace into the gift giving fool that he is. She made me a total of 12 drawings and helped him pick everything out. Yesterday (my actual birthday) right before her ballet performance she was "sharing" with the group. Mind you she stated this in front of the entire group of parents, "Grace what would you like to share today?" "Today is my mom's birthday and I picked her out a lacy bra and panties for her!" THANKS!! However, the point not to be lost is that I really do need these things and Grace knew that, hence, she picked them out all by herself. The whole gift was entirely her idea. And this is where I get happy. My husband has this uncanny ability to pick out gifts for people that they will love and need. He seems to be passing this ability on to Grace. So proud! because if you think about this, that ability is pretty rare. I know it is impossible for me; I'll think about what to get someone (including my husband) for hours!!! And then Wade will think of something and it will be PERFECT AND WHY DIDN"T I THINK OF THAT!!
Anywho, the birthday celebration was fabulous if not slightly bittersweet. It was the first time in 33 years that my mom didn't tell me "happy birthday" and, you know, that was tough. I better just get used to it, cause we've got Thanksgiving and Christmas coming up. Whew. Where is that hole I can crawl into.

Thank you Wade!and Grace! for always knowing just what I need. XOXOX

Saturday, November 11, 2006

Just so long as Grace doesn't teach her to be a smart ass

I figured you people were having some Sydney withdrawls, so I am here to present to you the many unique qualities of my child (I am well aware that most of you are now rolling your eyes). I really just can't control myself. Not to mention lil miss Grace is going through some very terrible behavior issues at this time, so I think I'll still to lil miss thang for the time being. So here she is in all her glory:

Here she is placing beads on the little pegboard:

Here she is reading her book while lounging on the floor chair:

Here's a video of her using a fork:

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Here is a video of her coloring:

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Here is a video of her continuing to piss her mom off:

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All this and STILL no walking!!!

Monday, November 06, 2006

she's still got it...

Unfortunately Sydney had other things in mind this morning when we took her for surgery.

Yeah. 101 fever. So, no surgery. Dr. K said the risk for pneumonia was too great since she was running the fever. Obviously I was grateful for this for many reasons. 1) clearly we wouldn't want her leaving the office sicker than when she went in and 2)I didn't have to deal with the entire event. I have to admit that I was kinda relieved. I worried about her all weekend and this put us home by 7:30.

Whew. I called her in an antibiotic to clear up the probable ear infection and we will try again another time. I really want to put the whole damn thing off for awhile because, you know, I saw this as a sign.

So, we'll see.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BUBBY!!!! (I won't tell his age...let's just say he's 7 years older than me and I'm about to turn 33...hmmmmmmmmmm)


Saturday, November 04, 2006

Gotta love Halloween

Halloween 2006 was a fantastic success. Grace wants me to dress up every year with her, so we decided to both be Wonder woman:

Wow, I'm looking mighty scary! More like Wonder Woman in drag!

Anywho, it was fun. Wade and the two Chris'(his brother) took the big girls while Ashli and I handed out candy. Gotta say I was glad we didn't have to brave the cold, but, damn, if we didn't have hundreds of dressed up (and dressed down) goons. We didn't even have time to perch our lazy asses on the chair. Here are some more pics of the festivities:

Thursday, November 02, 2006

And this is where my job starts to suck...

Ok, I'm kidding about it sucking, I still LOVE it, but yesterday I had to talk to a 16 year old boy who had beat his 33 day old baby so hard it landed her in ICU for many weeks. To the point where the doctors thought she wouldn't make it. Yeah. Nice. The most unbelievable part was the fact that he is absolutely denying it claiming that it had to be his mother. All the evidence points to him (you know, his confession to the cops) and the fact that there is no way she could have done this to herself (his initial response). It is just so f*cking sad, people! I talked to him for about an hour yesterday and he is one of this people that has absolutely NO remorse whatsoever and all he cares about is getting out of detention (he's been in there 99 days). I tried everything to get him to take responsibility for this, but it was like talking to Ted Bundy. Cold, callous and downright scary.

His court date was yesterday to determine what the judge was going to do with him. He already plead guilty about a month ago, but claims it was only to get a lighter sentence. He wanted to be put on probation and released to his grandmother (who is a complete f*cking idiot) and then get treatment in the community. He was SO POSITIVE that the judge was going to let him go home even after I repeatedly told him that I felt he was being overly optimistic. He didn't believe me. Unfortunately for him, the judge placed him in the custody of Oklahoma Juvenile Affairs where he will remain in custody at an inpatient treatment center until he is 20. He was not a happy camper. Me on the other hand, a little happy. And no I don't think this kind of a thing makes me unable to do my job properly. I am simply there to get information and then discuss it with the lawyer. I don't have to stand up and defend him. Thank God for that.

Oh and by the way, his baby is in foster care now and the state is attempting to terminate his parental rights in April. Heavy shit.

Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Under the Knife...

For all you out-of-towners, Sydney will finally be getting that gargantuan thing of her left cheek! We took her to the Dermatologist and he said it was a Spitznuvess...that's just an ugly name for a juvenile benign melanoma. Of course the thing can't just be frozen off, Sydney has to get all high falutant on us and have the operation performed on her by a plastic surgeon (wow, she's starting early!). So our adorable little one has to be put under anesthesia and have the damn thing surgically removed. And, yes, it HAS to be removed because of the rapid growth of the little bugger the chances are good that it could turn malignant. Waaa...sniffling...I'm sure I'll be a wreck on Monday. The doctor assures us that they will take the utmost care of her and the entire thing will only take 30 minutes. She'll have 4 stitches that I have to guard with my life or she'll have to have her arms taped down so she doesn't mess with it and increase the chances of an ugly scar...I swear I will check myself into a mental hospital if that has to happen. Can you imagine how PISSED she will be? Wow. The stitches will come out 4 days later and she will have a permanent scar. He said that by the time she is a teenager it will barely be visible based on the placement (it's in that little curvy part next to the nose). Sad. I know. So everybody, and I mean everybody, needs to be thinking about the little toot on Nov. 6 at 7:45am. Kay?
Here is the last look of the spitznuvess :

On a lighter note, we went to her 15 month check-up today and all systems are a go. She is 22 lbs. (yes, that's it) and 29 inches. 50 percentile for both. I swear she looks so much chubbier than that. Anyway, she was way in the mood to impress and was showing Dr. Julie her entire repertoire of animals, singing and such. Dr. Julie looked at her standing and said that she's fine, just choosing not to walk. So, there's that. No need to worry.

Happy Halloween people!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sunday, October 29, 2006

Captured: One Very Drunk, Bald Hispanic Man

So everyone knows what a freak I am about daylight savings. Kids went to bed late in hopes that they would sleep late. So, thanks to my annoying cold, I started coughing around 5:15 (really 6:15 to me). Sadly, it wakes Wade up who then realizes that he is starving and heads downstairs for a little snack. Not 5 minutes later he is back upstairs turning on all the lights,
"There's somebody in our backyard and he's trying to break in!"
"Well, call the cops!"
"I am!" (he then proceeds to get his gun from the top shelf of the closet)

Panic ensues as he calls 911 and is telling the dispatcher the details. We are both sitting on the stairs at this point when we hear the crazy bastard trying to OPEN OUR SIDE DOOR! which is locked, no thanks to me. Wade: "You guys better hurry he's trying to get in and I've got a gun." Me: "Wade, go put the gun up, we're not shooting anybody!" At which point the man takes off (I'm assuming here because we heard the patio door slam REAL LOUD).

A few minutes later the cops show up (you all know this is my favorite part) and I then spy on them from the upstairs bathroom window. They've got guns drawn and are all over our backyard, backhouse and side porch. Once it was established that the guy was indeed gone, he knocks on the front door REAL LOUD. Thankfully Wade put the gun up and we then go outside and Wade begins telling him that he actually saw the guy (which I didn't know at this time) and said he was a light-skinned black or hispanic guy, bald with a coat on. I have to say I was pretty impressed seeing that all this happened so fast and is was very dark still. So the cop said, "do you think you could identify him because we have someone in custody." Wade, of course said that he could and here comes another cop car with the guy inside. I then turned to Wade and said, "now really look at him and don't just say yes." So, the guy gets out of the car and it was almost comical because he was a bald (well, almost, he has like a very short haircut), hispanic and a blue coat on. Wade goes, "well, I'm not sure now, thanks Ginny" Oops. I kinda psyched him out by telling him to be sure.

ok. So it's about 6am at this point and I head back upstairs. It turns out that Wade had called our security guys before 911 who zoomed over here before the cops had shown up and actually saw the guy walking down our driveway, croutch between the neighbors car and then begin walking down the street. The security guy says, "can I help you?" to which the guy ignores and keeps walking (or staggering based on his level of drunkeness). The security guy decided to follow him because he looked suspicious and then flagged the cop down.

Bingo, bango. Perp in custody.

Why he was trying to come into our house is beyond me...maybe the couch looked cozy:)

Now, onto the most amazing part about this whole story...both kids slept til 7. Whoda thunk it!

Monday, October 23, 2006

Grace-isms Part I

I know I have been writing a lot about the ever-changing, always-darling Sydney. Today I thought I would hit ya with some funny Grace-isms that she's let out lately.

1. After getting some dessert from Deep Fork with her friend Anna she says, "Triple Score!!!!!!!!!!!"
2. She asked me if (her uncle) Matt was a teenager. I said yes to which she replied, "why is he so nice then?" Good point.
3. When something potentially bad happens she lets out, "SNAP!" Really don't know where she got that one because the only person I know that says that on a regular basis is Ashli's husband, Chris.
4.She says "Garvage" for "Garbage" and "velt" for "belt".
5. When I told her Sydney would be getting her "mole" removed she asked, "will it come right back when she looks at daddy dad?" (my dad has a mole in the same spot as Sydney)
6. She brought up the fact that she wants a brother (ha!ha!)to which I replied, "Oh I really don't want to do that again, Grace." She then reminded me, "yea, that would mean your stomach would have to get all filled up with air again and you would be HUGE like last time!!"
7. And the #1 funniest thing she has said to date. We were talking to our nanny, Raye, the other day and she asked if she could move in with us. Raye said, "But Grace, where would I sleep?" to which Grace replied, " I know, you could sleep on top of my daddy!" I shit you not, she said that. Raye and I looked at each other and started rolling. To which Grace got angry and huffed off for laughing at her. Some laughs I can stifle, but that was not one of them!

There are plenty more that I'll post at a later date!

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Goodbye USPO...forever!!

Why is it everytime I go to the post office there is a line a freakin' mile long? I swear to the heavens. I went in there to put some stamps on my envelopes to mail to the IRS and I stood in line for 15 minutes. in the same spot. without moving. I finally had to leave after making not one tiny step forward.

It's like the postal workers don't even notice that there are 25 people in line, 5 of them ladies over the age of 90. They just continue to talk to each other like they're on their lunch break. One woman had the nerve to actually go in the back and put the packages in the correct spot. Now, I'm all for putting the shit in the right spot, but, for God's sake, just put it on that little ledge behind you until the line dies down. And then there was the guy who hogged one postal worker for the entire 15 minutes that I was there. Oh, boy, they were having a gay old time just chatting about how much this versus that would cost and while you're at it, how much would this be? It was ridiculous.

And it happens EVERY time I step foot in there. I just slapped a whole bunch of stamps on the damn envelopes and flew to pick Grace up at school. I'm officially done!!!!!!!!!

Saturday, October 14, 2006

Please humor me

I know, it seems that I only post things about Sydney on this blog. But really, she's the one going through all the damn changes and doing the super-cute-baby-things. Everyone that knows me, knows that I also talk about Grace (although lately she has been more of a thorn in my side!). Next post will definitely be dedicated to her. But, for now, here is that little crazy girl doing what she does best!

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Friday, October 13, 2006

Baby Got Back

Look at that bootie! Why is it that my children have such full figured bottoms. I mean mine isn't petite by any stretch of the imagination, but my God, those kids have got some junk in the trunk!

Friday, October 06, 2006

to all my peeps

Dear Internet friends!
This is Sydney here, and I just wanted to let everyone know that they can just stop worrying about me RIGHT NOW! I here you people talking about me (right in front of me no less!) And I just want to set the record straight: I'm a lazy ass! and simply am not walking because...I don't want to! I can crawl faster than I can walk and, frankly, think it's kinda funny to worry my mom. I stand up, she asks me to walk to her and I simply sit down. Now that's comedy. I'm leaving you with this little video of me taken by my mommy (God, her voice is annoying!) just to prove to you all that I can put weight (heavy as it is) on my cankles/feet. Enjoy!

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AKA the wimpy warrior AKA the crusher AKA the biatch

Friday, September 29, 2006

Life Changing

I ran across this poem/story on another blog that I randomly read. Often times I think about how much my life has changed since having children, but it's always more than I can explain. This is the first thing I've read about motherhood where I actually thought, "YES OH MY GOD YES THIS IS WHAT I"M TALKING ABOUT!!!!!!!!" Hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

We are sitting at lunch one day when my daughter casually mentions that she and her husband are thinking of starting a family.
"You think I should have a baby?"
"It will change your life," I say, carefully keeping my tone neutral.
"I know," she says, "no more sleeping in on weekends, no more spontaneous vacations..."

But that is not what I meant at all. I look at my daughter, trying to decide what to tell her. I want her to know what she will never learn in childbirth classes. Want to tell her that the physical wounds of child bearing will heal, but becoming a mother will leave her with an emotional wound so profound that she will forever be vulnerable. I consider warning her that she will never again read a newspaper without asking, "What if that had been MY child?" That every plane crash, every house fire will haunt her. That when she sees pictures of starving children, she will wonder if anything could be worse than watching your child die.

I look at her carefully manicured nails and stylish suit and think that no matter how sophisticated she is, becoming a mother will reduce her to the primitive level of a mama bear protecting her cub. That an urgent call of "Mom!" will cause her to drop a soufflé or her best crystal without a moment's hesitation. I feel that I should warn her that no matter how many years she has invested in her career, she will be professionally derailed by motherhood. She might arrange for childcare, but one day she will be going into an important business meeting and she will think of her baby's sweet smell. She will have to use every ounce of discipline to keep from running home, just to make sure her baby is all right.

I want my daughter to know that every day decisions will no longer be routine. That a five year old boy's desire to go to the men's room rather than the women's at McDonald's will become a major dilemma. Right there, in the midst of clattering trays and screaming children, issues of independence and gender identity will be weighed against the prospect that a child molester may be lurking in that restroom. However decisive she may be at the office, she will second-guess herself constantly as a mother.

Looking at my attractive daughter, I want to assure her that eventually she will shed the pounds of pregnancy, but she will never feel the same about herself. That her life, now so important, will be of less value to her once she has a child. That she would give it all up in moment to save her offspring, but will also begin to hope for more years - not to accomplish her own dreams, but to watch her child accomplish hers.

I want her to know that a cesarean scar or shiny stretch marks will become badges of honor. My daughter's relationship with her husband will change, but not in the way she thinks. I wish she could understand how much more you can love a man who is careful to powder the baby's bottom or who never hesitates to play with his child. I think she should know that she will fall in love with him again for reasons she would now find very unromantic.

I wish my daughter could sense the bond she will feel with women throughout history who have tried to stop war, prejudice and drunk driving in defense of children. I hope she will understand why I can think rationally about most issues, but become temporarily insane when I discuss the threat of nuclear war to my children's future. I want to describe to my daughter the exhilaration of seeing your child learn to ride a bike. I want to capture for her the belly laugh of a baby who is touching the soft fur of a dog or cat for the first time. I want her to taste the joy that is so real it actually hurts.

My daughter's quizzical look makes me realize that tears have formed in my eyes.
"You'll never regret it," I finally say.
Then I reached across the table, squeezed my daughter's hand and offered a silent prayer for her, and for me, and for all the mere mortal women who stumble their way into this most wonderful of callings. This blessed gift ... that of being a Mother.

Sunday, September 24, 2006

Single Parenthood

I swear to God, some days I know exactly how it feels to be a single parent and...IT SUCKS!! Wade is working soooo much lately and this was the second Sunday where he has been gone all day and night. I took Sydney to church after the service (Grace went with my godparents) to see the unveiling of our new Sunday School area and by the time we walked and walked and walked to see the new rooms my arm felt like it was going to fall off. It really was getting numb. You simply take for granted the, "here you go, honey" factor. There was NOONE to give her to and I couldn't put her down for a good 20 minutes. By the time we got to the car I wanted to close my eyes and the whole thing took just under an hour. Whew. The day was so damn long. Now I know some of you reading this are probably cursing and telling me to cry a f*cking river, but unless you have a spouse that is gone more than he is there, you have to feel the tiniest bit sorry for me. Sure, there are perks to be married to my husband. He is an incredible person. Very sweet, loving and (of course) hardworking. He brings me food home on a regular basis and has never said one negative thing about my lack of homemade food. And when I do cook he acts like it should be on the Deep Fork menu. So really, this is less about him as a person and more about how sucky it is to be the wife of an overacheiving maniac! So really, is there really any wonder why my kids go to bed so damn early?

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Sorry it has taken me so long to put up a new post, but my week has been sooooo busy. As most of you know I started work this week. WEEEEEEE!! I was very worried last week just because I wasn't really sure exactly what I would be doing and then add to that my fear that I was doing the wrong thing (you know, the mommy guilt). But now that I have worked 2 days, my fears are all but gone. I LOOOVVVVEEE IT! I know, I'm weird, I'm making less per hour than my "nanny". Please don't do the math, it's embarrassing. But the work itself is exactly what I had hoped. My official title that I wear on the badge around my neck is "forensic interviewer" which I thought sounded pretty cool and also slightly intimidating because I've never actually been trained in interviewing, per se (although I've done more of it than almost anything). So anyway, blah, blah, blah...What I am doing specifically is working with the public defenders interviewing their clients and their parents before their preliminary hearing. I try to get as much information about them as to aid in their defense. Get it? Any-the-who the work is soooo interesting and frustrating all at the same time. Most of the kids I am working with are in the juvenile detention, which is basically kiddie jail, but once I am in the courtroom the lawyer puts me to work, meeting with the kids and their family members. Plus, I spend 90% of my day in court, which everyone knows is my FAVORITE thing.
I'm so tired though. The work is intense and by the time I get home my legs feel like they are going to fall off my body. Hopefully I'll get used to that soon. You will not find me complaining however. It's so refreshing to think that I am actually putting to good use my training and education! FINALLY! Okay, enough about all that!

The girls are fantastic and as far as I can tell haven't been affected by the slight change in the routine. Although, my first day of work Sydney kept saying, "BYE" to me at least 30 minutes before I left. True, it could be her crazy psychic ability, but I really think it's because I was dressed with shoes on as opposed to my robe and slippers. She's a weird one though. Oh, and she's on a break from that walking thing. Who-da-thought. Two steps and she's done. Grace is also doing well although she did get put in time out at ballet the other day for laughing. I'm sure it won't be the last time as I remember continually getting in trouble at school for too much talking AND my mom used to as well. She really doesn't stand a chance.

Have a great week.
I'm praying for you Merle.

Friday, September 15, 2006

The Leash

I know other people that I read have posted about this topic before, but I just have to add my two cents. The other day Sydney and I were at Gymboree for a little fun and afterwards were headed to City Bites for a little lunch and along the way we encountered a mom and her two kids. The little girl was about 3 and the little boy was 5. For some ungodly reason the little boy was forced to wear a leash. Now, when I first saw them, my immediate response was horror. And then, trying to be a better person, thought to myself, "who knows, maybe the little guy is a holy terror and had done something horrible in the past which would warrant a human leash." So, we happened to be heading in the same direction and I just listened. The little girl was running around like a bat out of hell with the mother continuously trying to reign her back to them. The little boy kept asking his mom, "WHHHYYY DO I HAVE TO WEAR THIS" and "MOMMMMMY LET ME GET OFFFFFFF." The mom continued to say (loudly), "No, so-and-so this is a far as you can go." Hmm. Perplexing. We all reached City Bites together and at this point was feeling really sorry for the little guy. He was obviously embarrassed (rightly so) and really didn't seem to be that wild and crazy. So I took the opportunity to ask his mom a few questions while we were all standing in line. "how old is he?" "He's 5." "Must have made you run after him a few times (laughing)." "No, I just don't trust him." "Oh." Are you kidding me? That was not the response I was expecting. It was so vague and almost paranoid that I couldn't even think of a comeback for that one.
What do you guys think? Isn't that peculiar? I mean I can almost understand the damn thing if they were walking up May Avenue, but Northpark Mall?!? It's the least busy mall and really, what could he have done? Stolen jewels from B.C. Clark?

Monday, September 11, 2006

One Giant Step for Mankind...

O.K.,it may not be that big of a deal, but the big girl actually took one step. And then sat down. It was last Saturday and Ashli witnessed it as well. It was such a teensy step that I had to ask her if it counted and if I should put it in the baby book. Of course I'm going to! Anyway, I got her to take 2 steps today at ballet so yay!!! for Sydney. She's actually contemplating the idea of joining the human race and walking on her hind legs!
Not a whole lot more to report except that my once obnoxious baby has turned back into the lovable creature that I used to know and adore. She has stopped screaming irrationally and crying unexpectedly and is a whole lot more fun than the past couple of weeks so yay!!! for Sydney.
Sure wish I could post some new and adorable pics of my little ballerina and my little walker (ha!) but I'm still waiting for the thingy to arrive in the mail, so until then...AufWiedersehen!

Friday, September 08, 2006

For some of you that are wondering the interview went grrrreat! I met with the public defender on Wednesday to talk about where they could use me and he came up with occasional part time work at the Juvenile Center on Classen and 57th. They seem to be having problems getting those kids to open up and talk about their lives. Imagine that. Most of these kids have been abused and/or neglected their entire lives and can't trust a flea. I don't know if I can make any head way, but surely I'm better suited than some underpaid lawyers. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure they are pretty good at what they do, but trying to get an adolescent to talk is hard under the best of circumstances. So we'll see. I'm supposed to call him back on Monday to find out the final word. Again, wish me luck. I have never worked with kids (except my own, who are on the opposite spectrum of abused/neglected) and from everyone I've talked to, they are by far the toughest population because they feel invincible and haven't fully grasped consequences. So there you go! I'm way excited to put my skills to use. Let's just hope I don't screw them up more!

Now onto the fireball, aka Sydney Robin. She's killing me. Jamie, help me out here. How old was Max when he went through that phase where all he did was cry/whine/grunt/moan? I remember asking you at the time what was wrong with him and you mentioned that he was going through a phase. And then I slightly remembered those random obnoxious phases that they go through. So anyway, she's definately going through something. It's like she is happy one minute playing and then she'll just be furious and start bawling/screaming. I know I need to practice patience but since I waited so long between kids I have competely forgotten all the little phases and quirks that go along with it. Blah. Blah. Blah. Boring fodder for all of you. I need to just get over it!

Tuesday, September 05, 2006

The Labors of Labor Day

Let's all spell it together T-E-E-T-H-I-N-G. I have to admit, I would secretly scoff at the moms who complained about their children cutting teeth. I would think to myself, "oh, it can't be that bad" or "it's just an excuse for their babies being soooo grumpy." But people, I eat my words. And I rarely do that. This baby has never had so much saliva in her entire life. But, see, that's the good part. She is so utterly pissy that I can barely stand to be in the same room with her. Apart from her getting upset from everything to not being able to turn pages fast enough or the dog barely tapping her precious little shoulder, she can't eat. You people that know Sydney know this it the equivalent of me finding out that the DVR didn't tape Big Brother. This has sent her over the edge. If it has any texture to it, she bawls. I've had to feed her malt-o-meal for every meal the last 2 days. And this is very upsetting for the rest of the family as well. Gone are the days of semi-peaceful meals where my biggest issue was not being able to feed her fast enough. She just sits in her highchair and screams. Snacks for appeasement are gone for now. And I really feel sorry for her because I know it must really hurt. But she's KILLING ME!! a slow and very painful death. If you ever find out that you only have an hour to live, come to my house for that hour and I promise it will feel LIKE FOREVER!!!!!!!!!!

So unfortunately, our Labor Day sucked which pisses me off because Wade actually had 2 days off in a row (kinda) and they were spent running around trying to make the baby happy which was a goal unreachable...that is, until the sweet time of 7pm when I lay her down and just walk away. That was my favorite part of Labor Day. Sad, no?

How was your Labor Day? Was it filled with peaceful playing and laughing children?

Sunday, September 03, 2006

Lil help fellow bloggers

As you can see, I have this cute little slide thing on the top. How the hell do I get it to center? It looks like it's about to fall off the page. Brooke? Jamie? I know both of you probably know, so help me PLEASE! Also, while you are helping me, let me know how to change my template from the boring ole blogger templates. I know you can download other ones from the internet, but I don't know where to cut and paste on my template? Help? A little?

Friday, September 01, 2006

Life may be a changin'

Sorry to say that, no, I have not found the thingy and am decidedly blaming someone else for the loss. I have looked in all my favorite hiding spots to no avail. I am sorry Brooke, but I guess you'll have to truck your ass back to Oklahoma to see that baby. Or maybe Ashli will one day get a computer.

Annnnyway, it's time for this monotonous mother to make a change. And that is coming in the way of employment. Like a job. Yep, it's time to get my juices flowing again and enter the world of work. Call me crazy, but I actually have a higher education that I spent tons of money on, only for me to sit on my ass (ok, I'm usually on my feet, but you get what I'm saying) and let all those skills go to waste. I actually have an interview with someone next week were I will beg and plead him to hire me part-time...I will definitely give details next week if I get the job.

Are you wondering why I would do such a thing? I'll tell you, plain and simple: I'm bored out of my everylivingmind!!!!!!!!! I love my kids, but now that Grace has started school, I find my self slightly lonely. I asked myself what is so different about this year seeing that Grace went to full-time pre-k last year. And then it dawned on me: I don't have my mom to hang out with. She would always come over, hang out, make lunch or Syd and I would go over there for chatting. I've got to get out of this house and do something that I enjoy so I can then come home to my children and enjoy and appreciate them as well.

No, I don't know if it is the right decision. But if I don't see what's out there I feel like I will regret it down the line.

Wish me luck!
And Happy Labor Day weekend!

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

annoyed beyond belief

I'm tired of my previous post about the 90's. I have 5 pictures of Stella to post that show how big and cute she is getting. BUT I CAN'T FIND THE THINGY THAT CONNECTS THE CAMERA TO THE COMPUTER. This is the kind of thing that drives me absolutely batshit. I'm one of those people that sees this "thingy" and says, "I sure would hate for this to get chewed up by the dogs or the baby, I'll just put it 'here'.

Except I can only remember where 'here' is about half of the time. I know this only lends itself to my complete and utter disorganization. And it pisses me off.

Now I'm sure some of you are wondering how anyone could be this disorganized when one has a housekeeper. Believe it or not, this really only adds to the disorganization problem (I know, cry me a river!). But really, sometimes I'll put the "thingy" in a specific spot only to find it months later piled with a bunch of other "thingy's" and I'll think to myself, "self, there is no way you put that thingy with all those other thingy's right there." But really, I know this problem is mainly mine and I'll continue to work at it, day in and day out, probably for the rest of my life.

So, I'm off to continue my mad quest! Hopefully new pictures will follow!

Friday, August 25, 2006

The 90's

My anniversary has come and gone, but I thought it would be fun to take us through a path down memory lane, a montage of what would be the future Mr. and Mrs. Starr. I'm sure you are now jumping for joy with the excitement!!!!!!!!!!

This first picture was taken in 1995 the year that we met. Dare I tell you that I was a mere 22 years old (Wade was 25!) Don't we look the same! Just kidding, we look like babies.

This next picture was also in 1995, on our first trip to Las Vegas (we went together a mere 3 months after our first date...wasn't I so spontaneous and fun! Just like now! Not!) Once again, looking so young and in love. Take note of my fingernails, they're blue! WOW!! In fact, we are both blue from head to toe.

This picture was taken in '96 when we went to Phoenix for Halloween. I have no idea why I decided to dye my hair this color. All I can say was that I was much more adventuresome then. It's really not my best look.

This picture was taken the Christmas before we got married in 1998. We were looking a bit pudgy and tired. You could tell that we lived in Chicago at the time judging by how pale we were. Also, this was pre-Jenny Craig where I lost lotsa poundage before the wedding.

. And here is the final picture of the two of us on our honeymoon in Italy. I would kill to look like this again (...and I'm sure Wade would too). Note the street, that is actually a 2-lane road that we drove on-- very scary, but oh-so-beautiful.

Hope everyone enjoyed this little trip. I didn't include any photos from the '00's mainly because blogger only lets you do 5 pics and because the focus slightly shifted to the little ones. Have a good weekend!

Thursday, August 24, 2006

Pass the Tissue

First day of Kindergarten

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

And You?

You Are 55% Normal

While some of your behavior is quite normal...
Other things you do are downright strange
You've got a little of your freak going on
But you mostly keep your weirdness to yourself

O.K. this is kinda stupid, but I was also curious. See, I would have guessed that I was 99% normal. Whoda thought. A little worried about the "freak" thing.

Sunday, August 20, 2006

Gimme a freakin' break

I think this is a more appropriate name for a new movie:

Snakes on a baby

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I mean please, Snakes On A Plane. And people are excited to see this. It sounds absolutely ridiculous to me. Wade and I are not huge moviegoers, but, seriously, if we were, we would be super pissed. Here are the choices:

  • TALLADEGA NIGHTS: THE BALLAD OF RICKY BOBBY- 'nuf said. This movie sounds so ridiculously horrible, you couldn't pay me to see it.
  • STEP UP- seriously, who sees this kind of movie?
  • MATERIAL GIRLS- gag me, Haylie and Hilarie Duff! Looks and sounds horrendous.

  • BARNYARD: THE ORIGINAL PARTY ANIMALS- reviews are even bad on this kid flick.

  • THE FAST AND THE FURIOUS 3: TOKYO DRIFT- I loathe these kinds of movies and especially sequels...uggg!

  • MIAMI VICE - I also loathe shitty remakes. I'm sure this will also be bad.

    The only movie that looks halfway decent is The Illusionist, but that's because it has my boy Ed Norton.

    Tomorrow is my 7 year anniversary. Congratulations to me! Somedays I don't know how Wade and I can stand each other, but I can say that the word divorce is not even in my vocabulary. Marriage is damn hard, but committment and compromise is the key to our success!
    I love you Wade, Happy Anniversary.

Saturday, August 19, 2006

the ongoing saga of "DADA"

Sydney is a talking machine. Everyday she uses a new word appropriatley to my amazement. She's up to about 12 or so words including the following: hi, "lo" for hello, dada, daddy, "waa-waa" for water, "baa " for ball, "diddy" for Sydney, "Gay" for Grace, doggie (this is used for dogs, cats, cows, etc), done, up, "thee" as in 1-2-"thee" emphatically. I can tell she's way beyond normal in the verbalization department( not so much in the physical department, you know, she's kinda lazy about walking.) I think she may take after her mama.
Except she won't say "mama". I mean I am starting to think that she does it on purpose. I'll say "mama" and she'll say, "dada". I'll say "mommy" and she'll say "daddy." No lie. If Wade is in the room, she'll say daddy like a thousand times, looking at him, smiling. Me, NADA!!!!! Just cute smiles and sniffs and every other word in her ever expanding vocabulary. Now, here is the part that makes me think something fishy is going on. My babysitter, Raye, claims that she says mommy and mama all the time. Wade says the same thing. And anyone who has been around Sydney knows that she will talk on command.
So what gives?
And really I don't know why I care. I get so tired of hearing "mom" all the live long day that maybe I should teach her another word for mommy altogether while I still have time. Any ideas?

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Happy Belated Birthday Stella

I've been meaning to post about the newest addition to the chick club, Miss Stella Scott born 08-07-06! Oh my God, she is sooo little and precious, although she did surpass her birthweight today (6#1oz--woohoo!) Anyway, Grace is very "jealous" of Anna and can't stand how adorable she is. She wanted to hold her and then wouldn't let me take her! She keeps telling me that I should have another one (fat chance IUD!). Good job, Ashli!!!!!!!!!!!

Sunday, August 13, 2006

OMG we're finally home

Did you miss me? A little bit? Sorry I didn't have time to post before we left, but last Thursday we went to Cuchara Colorado for one of my best friends weddings. You know, the one where Grace was the flower girl! That part was very exciting. She made best friends with the other little kids her age, which was really fun to see. During the wedding she whispered loudly, "THEY ARE ABOUT TO KISS," to her new little friend, the other flower girl. I can't wait to see the video with me glaring at her the whole time. But I'm getting way ahead of myself here. The flight and drive was, as expected, simply horrific. Sydney was not the friendly traveler and had to be passed back and forth from mommy to daddy the whole way. And she developed this incredible screech that the other passengers did not find cute or appealing. The car ride was even worse. Lots of screeching and crying. I swear that child must have carsickness because she absolutely despises the car. I did my best to ignore her, as it seemed that helped better than trying to play with her. Oh I almost forgot. The airline didn't send my little red bag with all the essentials in it, such as toiletries, curling iron, perfume, and MY MAKEUP! Yep, the bag never made the trip to Cuchara and sat patiently for me in terminal 16 at the Denver airport. So that was fun too.
Once we finally arrived Sydney was beside herself and couldn't quite make it to the party on Thursday night. I wasn't too upset about that though. So the next couple of days were spent trying to keep her satisfied seeing that she wasn't up for much playing or partying. I have to give it to Wade, though. He was mom and dad on the trip and did a damn fine job of it. I was fairly busy attending to wedding things like decorating, hobnobbing, giving a (shitty) speech, standing up in the wedding and posing for pictures. So my hat comes off to him. The baby loved this though. I didn't think it was possible, but she is more of a daddy's girl than Grace was at this age. But, as expected, Grace was incredibly good on this trip and once again, handled Sydney's moods with ease. I'm sorry to say that I really don't have many exciting pictures to post from the wedding, but I do have one exciting revelation, documented below:


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Isn't that soooooo exciting! The only problem was that she spit the tooth out onto rocky terrain and we couldn't find it. We had to find a small white rock to replace the tooth with. It looked remarkably like the tooth even though she wondered why her tooth was so "crooked" looking. Oh well! She didn't know the difference.

Anyway, very glad to be home and I don't think we'll be taking anymore trips for a while. Can't wait to see everyone.

Saturday, August 05, 2006

In light of the Mel Gibson issue

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I swear to God I have no idea where she heard/learned this. She went to a Jewish camp over Christmas break (don't laugh) and came back saying this. That and that the song is actually Chinese. WOW!

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

more pics from the birthday

sorry, but I have to post some more pics from the event. They were too cute to pass up. Enjoy!

How cute is Charlie? what an adorable balloon parasol!

Now I'm sorry to say that Annaliese got the shit-end of the deal with this wimpy wiener dog; she doesn't look too impressed!

Even JH got in on the action, is this kid ever unhappy...hmmm, just give him time.

And of course the naughty duo, Grace and Anna! (If you're wondering about how these adorable girls could be naughty just remember the haircut debauchery of '05!)

And finally, it's SUPERBABY!!!!!!!

Sunday, July 30, 2006

1 down...99 to go (we hope)!

The birthday girl with her uncle Bubby!

Well folks, the first birthday party for little miss Sydney when down without a hitch (save my piercing headache). It was much like Grace's first with all the people, but this time there were MANY more children, which Syd loves. We had a magician for the older kids who also specializes in the most amazing balloon creations. So fun! And I think the kids really liked it as well. The poor man had to take on at least 10 kids at any given time, shouting and squealing for balloons. Grace had a blast and was sooo proud of her baby sister. I have to say the actual singing of the birthday was sooo amazing this time around. She loved the singing (and chanting by the other children to "eat your cake, eat your cake") and actually ate her cake and LOVED it (of course). And get this: she still took her nap! Yea!
Here is a pic of one proud mama holding the darling little cake that I made for her (the icing was homemade with lots of butter, cream cheese and powdered sugar!)

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Here she is impatiently waiting for the cake!

And this is when I first set the cake down. She was a little unsure...

And now we're getting somewhere...mmmmmm

Mommy loves you, Sydney!